A Pepper Grinder Post

When God Whacks You

I have had some pretty lousy days. I should qualify that. I have never had a day where one of my children died or I found out that my wife was cheating on me or I discovered that I had Stage IV cancer. So, by some people’s standards, I have not had a lousy day. What I mean is that I have had some days that felt pretty bad to me.

I have had days when it seemed like everything that could go wrong at work, did go wrong. I have had days when something that was very painful emotionally just ran me down like a crazed steamroller operator. I’m sure this is mild by some people's standards but they were days that seemed awful to me.

I tend to start thinking in one of two basic ways when this happens.

1. God is mean.
2. I must have really messed up.

The first is pretty obviously off-base Biblically because it assumes that I am in the right and deserve to have only good things happen to me. Since I don’t deserve the negative emotions I’m experiencing, God must be unkind and unfair.

The second is trickier. In a sense it is right, just as there was a certain amount of truth in the words of Job’s comforters. The Bible clearly teaches that none of us are without sin (1 John 1:8), so what is wrong with seeing my suffering as a punishment for my sin? And yet, this also falls short as an explanation for suffering. For one thing, Jesus himself had plenty of suffering and ended his life on earth with a day that was the mother of all bad days, and he was 100% without sin.

For another, it gives the impression that suffering is a bad thing that we should be trying to avoid, but if you look at how suffering is spoken of in the Bible, and especially in the New Testament, you will see clearly that suffering is not an unexpected part of the Christian life. For example, in 1 Peter we read:

To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps. (I Peter 2:21, NIV)

Another way that some Christians choose to think about suffering is to decide that God does not cause suffering, but that it results either from our bad choices or the fact that we're living in a fallen world. This is appealing, because it makes God into a really nice guy who would never willingly hurt us. However, I think there are many problems with this view. For one thing, if God is all-powerful and allows bad things to happen to us, is that so very different from him causing those things to happen to us? The main problem with this view, however, is that it is unbiblical. The Bible consistently presents God as being in control. When disasters happened to the nation of Israel, the big question was always, "Why did God do this?" There was never any doubt that God had done it. When Christians in the New Testament suffered for their faith, they rejoiced at being counted worthy of suffering for Christ. They didn't assume that God hadn't actually wanted them to suffer.

If you are someone who holds this view, I challenge you to read through the Bible with this question in mind: Is God shown as the One who is in control of everything, both good and bad? If you reply that God is in control, but deliberately chooses to limit his power, my question is: Where does the Bible teach that?

So if none of these ways of looking at suffering are right, what IS the right way? Here is what the Bible says:

You have entirely forgotten the encouragement which is spoken to you as sons: “My son, don’t ignore the Lord’s discipline or give up when you’re corrected by him, because the Lord disciplines those he loves, and whips everyone he accepts as a son.”

Endure his training*—God is treating you like a son. For what son isn’t disciplined by his father? If you aren’t disciplined (and everyone who shares in the sonship is), then you are an illegitimate child and not a son.

We had earthly fathers who disciplined us, and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to our spiritual Father and live!

Our earthly fathers disciplined us for a little while in the way that seemed best to them, but God disciplines us for our advantage, so that we can share in his holiness.

No discipline seems joyful at the time, but painful. Afterward, however, to those who have been trained by it, it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness.

(my translation of Hebrews 12:5-11)

*In the Greek, literally, "In training, endure!"

The key words in this set of verses are a related Greek noun and verb, paideia (discipline or training) and paideuo (to discipline or punish). The Greek root behind these words is where we get the English word, pedantic. This, the Bible is saying, is what God is up to when he causes painful things to happen to us. He is training us. Fair enough, but what type of training? These verses make it clear that it’s like a father training his child, but there are many different parenting styles. Which one is God’s? Does he take away our toys when we disobey? Does he put us in time out? Does he spank us?

The Greek words paideia and paideuo don’t help too much with this. Paideia is only used six times in the New Testament, and four of those times are in our passage. Paideuo seems to be split fairly evenly between relatively gentle training (Moses being trained in the wisdom of Egypt, Paul being trained in the Law, Paul telling Timothy gently to instruct those who oppose him) and training that is more “hands on” (Pilate offering to punish Jesus and release him, Paul describing himself as beaten but not killed in 2 Corinthians 6:9, Paul telling Timothy to hand erring believers over to Satan so they can be taught not to blaspheme).

Lest we think that God has a Dr. Spock¹ style of parenting, the author of Hebrews throws in another word in Hebrews 12:6 which will not go along with this view. He says, the Lord disciplines those he loves, and whips everyone he accepts as a son. Whips? Really? The NIV just translates this word (mastigo-oh) as “punishes.” Let’s look at how this word is used elsewhere in the New Testament. It is used 6 other times. All these passages are in the Gospels. Five of them refer to or predict Christ being flogged, one predicts that the disciples will be flogged. Not a lot of wiggle room there. It’s a pretty brutal word.

Does this mean that God is a child abuser? I think there are a couple of things to remember here.

1. This was written at a time and place where corporal punishment was expected. It is clear from this passage and others in the Bible that physical punishment was the norm, at least for fathers with their sons. Sons expected it and respected their fathers for doing it, to the point where a son would not feel like a true son if his father never administered corporal punishment.
2. I do not believe that God fits into the stereotype either of a permissive parent who would never use corporal punishment or the rigid parent who uses “the rod” for every offense. In my experience, there are times when God just gives me a gentle nudge toward or away from something, or a calm rebuke. There are many times we need nothing more than this. There are other times that God gives me a blow that leaves me lying on the ground and gasping for breath. He knows exactly what I need. He doesn’t hurt me because he wants to see me suffer; he does it because he wants me to be united with him in perfection. He does no more and no less than what will best accomplish his loving purposes for me.

Perhaps the last paragraph sounds like I am advocating for the “I must have really messed up” interpretation of pain, but that is not necessarily true. I do believe God sometimes punishes us for things we have done wrong. On the other hand, I have had many experiences where I felt awful after I have messed up, and God seemed more to be comforting me than beating me up.

The key, I think, is that God is not just whacking us when we do wrong, but is molding us and shaping us into his image. He is like a parent who is not content just to have a child who doesn’t do bad things, but who wants his child to be the absolute best he or she can be. He is like a relentless coach who takes a decent but cocky athlete, tears him down, and then builds him back up as an Olympic athlete.

I did not intend this to be an article about how parents should or should not discipline their children. However, there is one point I want to make that seems crystal clear from the Bible. I do not know how we, as Christians, can say that corporal punishment is bad or take it out of our parenting arsenal. Not only does the Bible speak of it in a positive light in a number of places, but we see in this passage that God uses it as a simile for how he parents us! How can it be a bad thing for us to do?

I am not saying that it cannot be done in a bad way. I think that anytime a parent treats a child with cruelty, whether it is expressed physically or verbally or some other way, that is a bad thing. I believe that when God administers even the most devastating blows, he is always acting out of love and never out of cruelty. On the other hand, to say that no parent should ever spank a child, or even that spanking should be extremely rare, seems to me like saying that no one should go on a diet because some people are anorexic.

Another point which leaps out of this passage is that we should see God’s discipline of us as a positive thing and as normal. The problem with both ways of looking at unpleasant occurrences that I mentioned at the start (God is mean, or I really messed up), is that they both see discipline as something bad that one should figure out how to avoid. I’m not saying that we should seek out pain, but when it comes, we should see it as a sign that God loves us and is treating us as his son or daughter. Hebrews 12:8 even goes so far as to say that if we were never disciplined by God, it would be a sign that we were not truly his child. So, does pain hurt? Certainly. Is it a sign of God’s love and care for us, and of his desire to draw us into his perfection? Absolutely.

Finally, I would like to look once more at the following line near the start of our passage:

My son, don’t ignore the Lord’s discipline or give up when you’re corrected by him.

This shows two bad reactions to God’s discipline. The first is literally (in the Greek) to “make light of” God’s discipline. In this context, I think it means to ignore it. I often tend to do this as a dysfunctional coping mechanism. If the pain is mild enough that I can push it down and pretend it isn’t there, that is what I do. The problem with this is that God was bringing that unpleasantness into my life for a reason, and if I push it aside, he will generally either turn up the intensity or else keep bringing it back to me until I deal with it.

I think some Christians ignore pain out of a spiritualized positive thinking approach. One flavor of this kind of thinking would say something like, “God has given us the victory in Christ; we just need to claim it.” The way this often seems to play out is that pain gets ignored because to admit that you are hurting is to give in to the Devil, who is trying to take your mind off the victory you have in Christ. Instead of admitting the pain and trying to see how God might be using it, this approach leads to hearty positive statements that ignore pain. Thus, in the name of resisting the Devil, this approach does exactly what the author of Hebrews warns us against.

The other bad reaction is to give up. This is very much in line with the whole theme of Hebrews, which was written to encourage Messianic Jews, who were tempted to take the much easier path of letting the whole Jesus thing fall by the wayside. I can really empathize with this reaction. There are times when life seems so hard that I do think jealously of people who have the freedom to live their life in a way that minimizes pain. I think the message of this passage is aimed especially at people who feel like this. Your very hardship proves you are God’s child, and that he loves you and wants you to be perfect. You may be having a lousy day, but, because you are God’s child, you are being prepared for the best of days. God’s discipline is a very good thing.

- Pepper
Posted 2019-06-22

¹OK, I know I’m dating myself here. Dr. Benjamin Spock was a pediatrician and author who wrote Baby and Child Care, one of the best-selling child care books of all time, which was first published in 1946. He generally advocated what I would call a permissive style of child-raising.

*Image Credits - Coach and athlete from https://www.notgoingtouni.co.uk